Since just before August began I have gone through a lot of experiences, emotions and thoughts. On August 1st I attended a wedding (yay!), (my third now as Deja, yay!), reunited with an old boyfriend (yay!) , wasn't invited to a family birthday that my Mom went to (ow!), felt worse as my Mom was brought to the event by my ex (ow!) and her new hubby (very big ow!!!), felt separation anxiety as the old boyfriend left (ow!), reconnected with another man (yay!), hung with 3 good friends for a weekend (yay!), went to a nice party (yay!). thought about my future in the family (yay and ow!), thought about my future being with/without somebody (yay!/ow!) had 3 nights of crying (ow!), almost broke down crying at work (ow!), had one night of anger (ow!), saw the fruits of my writing (of my struggles with family and friends acceptance) published (yay and ow!)http://www.therainbowtimesmass.com/ (Click on the underlined hyperlink, click on the blonde gal and scroll to page 6), needed one night to be alone with no human contact (ow!), felt terrible (ow!), felt good (yay!), felt great *yay!), gained more confidence in myself (yay!) and now I'm ready to go at life and enjoy it to the fullest (yaaaaaaayyyyyyy!!!!!) . I never thought that two weeks could be so crazy on me!!! Ride the roller coaster of life, Deja!!!
What it comes down to is that once again I have learned to look at life positively, do not depend on anyone but myself for my happiness and to go out and live and experience and enjoy life!!! Yes, I have always done so since becoming Deja but sometimes I have to relearn it. I know I will relearn it again and again in the future. As long as I can relearn this I will be able to look at life where it meets with truth.
Sometimes truth can get you down. All of a sudden you see your shortcomings, yourself aging, the negative things about yourself etc. Things that you thought were rock solid and all good suddenly are neither. Wham!!! It happens!!! It happens to all of us and we have to deal with it. That's life!!!
I've always tried to see the truth and to be positive. These are my help with which I face the world every day. I also have my smile and my confidence.With these assets I can deal with most anything, but some days are tougher than others. Somedays my smile is absent and my confidence is shaken, truth hits me and leaves me vulnerable and my positivity may retreat for a while, but time heals me and I see things in a new light. Things that seemed huge are suddenly minimal and my assets return in full force. I have been wounded, healed myself, and now am headed out into the world for more!!
I see a lot of people who are steeped in anger and negativity. Some may even try to take my positive energy from me but most are so wrapped up in their own misery that I don't feel their pull to negativity. I try to steer myself to more positive people and feed off them as they do off me. That's how I do it.
I love to live, to love, to smile, to dance, to sing to play my guitar, to write, to share ideas, to laugh, to overcome the bad with the good,even if it's just for a while. A good friend recently told me that even when he gets ill he says to himself, "How can I make this fun?" That is such an outstanding outlook!!! That is sooo precious!!! I love to hear and learn messages such as that!!!
Let's face it, we live, we err, we get hurt, we feel bad, we get better we try again, we learn, we relearn. We've got to keep going and while we are at it why not have fun??? That's how I want to live!! I think that my new mantra is "There's nowhere to look but up!!!"
What it comes down to is that once again I have learned to look at life positively, do not depend on anyone but myself for my happiness and to go out and live and experience and enjoy life!!! Yes, I have always done so since becoming Deja but sometimes I have to relearn it. I know I will relearn it again and again in the future. As long as I can relearn this I will be able to look at life where it meets with truth.
Sometimes truth can get you down. All of a sudden you see your shortcomings, yourself aging, the negative things about yourself etc. Things that you thought were rock solid and all good suddenly are neither. Wham!!! It happens!!! It happens to all of us and we have to deal with it. That's life!!!
I've always tried to see the truth and to be positive. These are my help with which I face the world every day. I also have my smile and my confidence.With these assets I can deal with most anything, but some days are tougher than others. Somedays my smile is absent and my confidence is shaken, truth hits me and leaves me vulnerable and my positivity may retreat for a while, but time heals me and I see things in a new light. Things that seemed huge are suddenly minimal and my assets return in full force. I have been wounded, healed myself, and now am headed out into the world for more!!
I see a lot of people who are steeped in anger and negativity. Some may even try to take my positive energy from me but most are so wrapped up in their own misery that I don't feel their pull to negativity. I try to steer myself to more positive people and feed off them as they do off me. That's how I do it.
I love to live, to love, to smile, to dance, to sing to play my guitar, to write, to share ideas, to laugh, to overcome the bad with the good,even if it's just for a while. A good friend recently told me that even when he gets ill he says to himself, "How can I make this fun?" That is such an outstanding outlook!!! That is sooo precious!!! I love to hear and learn messages such as that!!!
Let's face it, we live, we err, we get hurt, we feel bad, we get better we try again, we learn, we relearn. We've got to keep going and while we are at it why not have fun??? That's how I want to live!! I think that my new mantra is "There's nowhere to look but up!!!"
2 comments:
Great outlook Deja !
I am glad you are over the rocky patch, and indeed have learned from it.
A toast to a mainly positive future with just enough "learning experiances" to make us appreciate the future.
I read a blog recently called "I wish you enough"
It was a saying this womans father had passed to her and it was written so much better than I could. However the main thrust of it was to wish people just enough of everything to enable us to appreciate everything.
Example being Just enough happiness to enjoy life, but just enough sadness to make us appreciate the good times even more.
In practice I liked this idea. Unfortunately we will get some tough times, but if it makes the good ones even better then what a positive result from it!
Take care big sister.
x
Hi Lisa,
Thank you for your comment! The "I Wish You Enough" is an interesting idea. Just enough of everything so that we can appreciate everything. I like that! Thank you for sharing that thought!
Luvs,
Deja
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