I have been somewhat observing those who have transitioned and I believe the real key to a successful transition is to be happy with yourself. I know that sounds a bit simplistic but it seems to play out.

In transitioning, the big thing to decide is to try the stealth route or the open Transpeep route. Both sides have their pros and cons. I believe that the stealth route is for those uncomfortable with being Trans and others knowing about it. They may slide into life unnoticed but they are always in fear of being outed. As long as they maintain their stealth they might enjoy life to the fullest as their true gender but from all thestealthies that I know I don't really see a lot of happiness. I'm sure that there are some but just the huge fear of being outed at any time must be awful. I remember that feeling when I was in myCrossdressing closet. You are forever and always on guard...Not a particularly settling way to live.

The out Transperson, on the other hand, has nothing to hide, nothing to be fearful of really. Yes, they may be looked upon as more Genderqueer than Trans but they get to live and be who they are. Now that is incredibly awesome!!! Plus the fact that no one can hold being Trans against them! Bonus!

But not all out Transpeeps are happy. I have also observed much sadness and other things in the Trans of the out world. But then again, most of these people may have been sad in the first place. It seem to my observation that the happy outTranspeeps are the ones who were happy souls from the beginning. Hey, how do these people feel happy anyway?

Some of them have always had a happy life, full of love and respect so they just continue on that avenue. Most of those who have had happy lives also seem to have better than average people skills. They can deal with people a bit better than most. For instance, when a non Trans refers to one of us as our natal gender what happens? I have seen some people have over the top fits about this while others just handle ittres cool. Don't make a big deal, just ignore or politely correct is the correct answer. Breaking down and losing it with anger or crying are not good answers and won't garner any sympathy. Trust me.

I have often been accused of not feeling sympathy for and not consoling the offended Transperson who gender has just been challenged but I firmly believe, it is what it is and the sooner that we realize and accept this, the better that we will be. I'm truly sorry but this is part of the deal when you are Trans. We asTranspeeps are really all Genderqueer and that's how most people will probably see us. We have to deal with their responses and their reactions in the best way that we can. If we can do this without bad drama then we just may come out of this fairly well. Really, that's the way it is, please think about it.

So I am an advocate of being an out Transperson and being happy and having people skills. That recipe has been working for me and I see it work very well for many others. It is what it is and we are who we are and that's the way that it so so let's just deal with it and enjoy our lives as our true selves!

I just watched a Quentin Crisp offering on LOGO this afternoon and I have a deep respect for Quentin after seeing this piece about him. His message was of the "Live as you are and it is what it is!" school of thought. I have always had that school of thought so I immediately attached and ID'd myself to him. If you get a chance to see it, please check it out! Btw, did you know that Sting did a song "Englishman in New York" which was written about Quentin after Sting visited him?

Yes, Sting is tres hot and is a wonderful entertainer but lets get back to my post!

I am interested in others thoughts about successful transitioning, what it means, what it is, how to do it., and what is considered successful? Please let me know your thoughts.